I saw a girl at 7-11 today, so i quickly asked what a good line was, based on a log of my convos i provided. So i used the line it recommended "Im about to call my mother, and tell her I just me the girl I wanna naill in the bathroom". She screamed asking repeatedly like a maniac "wHy arE yoU in The WoMenS rEstrOom?". So I thought, that was a fluke, but so is the critter in my liver. So it was worth a second go.
On my walk home, I saw my second target. Another cute girl, walking her dog. After consulting the app, I approached and let loose with the rizz; "are you my mother? Cause I'd really like to fondle you!". But the freakin girl C-blocked me, by pulling away the beautiful pooch and saying "why are you saying that to my dog? What is wrong with you?". Some people are so judgmental.
But goldilocks theory don't lie, the 3rd time was a success. I texted my next target "oo la la, you a pretty mamacita" to which my mom replied "you're so sweet! I hope im the only one you said that to today". Of course I told her she was, but didnt send the reply till 12:01am. I followed with a swoon-worty line of my own, "I may have spent a lot of time in a jail cell, but I'm no incel."
I love my mom.
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