Goose Alarm

Goose Alarm is the alarm clock you regret installing. Type anything you want to hear at wake-up time, and a goose will scream it at you tomorrow morning. Yes, you. Your words. A goose. At 6 AM. There is no app store category that covers this. — HOW IT WORKS — 1. Set an alarm like any normal app. 2. Write what you want the goose to say. ("Get up, idiot." "Today is leg day." "Your manager is already in the standup." Whatever fuels you.) 3. Tomorrow, your phone wakes you with a goose voice yelling your line. That's the whole product. — FOR PEOPLE WHO — • Have hit snooze every day this month • Are tired of gentle marimba sounds asking them politely to wake up • Believe shame is a more honest motivator than positivity • Just think a goose alarm is funny — FREE — • Full alarm functionality, on time, every time • 3 built-in goose voice patterns • No ads, no tracking, nothing collected — PREMIUM — • Unlimited custom voice lines (write your own, get yelled at by a goose) • 50 pre-written wake-up patterns from the goose's personal collection • 3-day free trial, then $9.99/month or $59.99/year — A NOTE ON TONE — The goose is mean for fun. It will roast you. It will not respect your boundaries. It is, however, friendly: no slurs, no cruelty about things you can't change, just the kind of mock-aggression that helps a lot of people actually get out of bed. If that's not your thing, this app is not for you, and that's fine. — PRIVACY — Goose Alarm does not collect personal data. The free app runs entirely offline. Premium voice generation sends your text to our server (which forwards it to ElevenLabs to synthesize the audio) — we don't retain that text and don't identify you. Full policy: https://privacy.goose-alarm.work — REQUIREMENTS — iOS 26 or later. Built on Apple's AlarmKit, so alarms fire reliably even through Sleep Focus (once added as an allowed app — instructions inside). Don't let the goose down. Get up.