Mt.Flushmore: Poop Tracker

Mt.Flushmore is a running total. You weigh what you produce, you log it, and the app keeps one number for the rest of your life. That number gets compared against real objects on a ladder where every rung is roughly twice the one below it — a golf ball, an apple, a brick, a house cat, a bowling ball, a toilet, an anvil, a grand piano, a compact car. Nobody clears a compact car in a hurry. That is the joke. THE LADDER Thirty-four objects across two packs, Classic and Animals. Weights further up are hidden until you reach them, because knowing exactly what a grand piano weighs turns the next rung into a countdown and ruins the surprise. THE ARMY Enter your body weight and a second track appears: your lifetime total, measured in copies of yourself. It arrives one eighth at a time, and every copy takes exactly as long as the first one did. SHARE CARDS Every milestone produces an image worth sending to somebody who did not ask for it. NO ACCOUNT, NO CLOUD No sign-up, no server, no analytics, no ads. Every entry is stored on your phone and never leaves it. Delete the app and the data goes with it. Mt.Flushmore is a novelty app. It gives no medical or health advice of any kind, makes no claims about your wellbeing, and is not a substitute for anything at all.