Silly Con Valley: Startup Sim
Tech Business & CEO Simulator
About
This satirical simulation game lets you build a tech startup from scratch. Navigate the challenges of hiring, product development, and securing funding through card-based pitch battles. Survive the volatile startup world and aim for a billion-dollar valuation or face bankruptcy.
What's New in Silly Con Valley
1.48
October 27, 2026
What's New in Silly Con Valley 1.48 ("Hype, Chaos & Virality"): VIRAL & CHAOS SUITE • Brutal VC Rejection Slips & Spite Fuel: Losing a VC pitch now delivers a personalized rejection letter with exportable share cards. Channel the insult into Spite Fuel for a 1.15x damage bonus in your next rematch against that investor. • Blurry.app Anonymous Leak Feed: When team morale drops or scandal strikes, anonymous employees leak internal company drama on Blurry.app. Defend your startup with a Burner Reply, a $5,000 Pizza Bribe, or an icy Ignore, and browse all leaks in the new Market Intel tab. • 10-Second Live Press Conference Minigame: Step up to the microphones during high-stakes PR crises. Choose between Gaslight, Buzzword Salad, or Throw CTO Under Bus before the 10-second countdown expires. • Sentient AI Treasury Hijack: AI Slop startups pushing cutting-edge models may encounter a rogue AGI attempting to spend company runway on GPU clusters—shut it down or pivot into an AI cult. EXECUTIVE SWIPE DECK & UX OVERHAUL • Tactile Executive Decision Cards: Monday Standup decisions, rival hostile maneuvers, and feature creep dilemmas now present as a centered physical card modal. Drag left or right (or tap the action buttons) with full, unwrapped stat impact pills showing exact cash, morale, hype, and valuation effects before you commit. • 1-Tap Actionable Fix Pills: Critical warnings in Morning Standup now include direct action buttons that jump straight to Bank Loans, the Product Wizard, the CEO Office, or Talent Recruiting. • Persistent Weekly Ledger Banner: Review your previous week's revenue, burn, and net cash delta at a glance in Morning Standup from Week 2 onward. • Streamlined Desktop Header: Replaced the duplicate settings button with a live CEO stress ring and unified System Menu. THE INSURANCE META & 18-SPECIALIST ROSTER • 6 New Specialists (18 Total): Expanded the specialist roster across Growth, Defence, and Intel tiers with six new satirical hires—Sheryl Sandbag, Spin Doctorow, Ed Snowfall, Nostradumbass, Rupert Smirchdoch, and Ana Nonymous—each with custom pixel-art portraits. • 0 AP Specialist Hiring & Poach Economy: Hiring or replacing a specialist now costs 0 AP (cash only), with a guaranteed weekly draw across all tiers and morale-driven rival poaching counter-offers. PITCH BATTLE, STAGE GATES & LEADERBOARD INTEGRITY • Enforced Funding Stage Gates: VC term sheets now lock the Accept Meeting button until your startup satisfies all target round traction gates, with a unified scroll viewport and clean stage badges. • Office-Scaled Hand Capacities (3 / 5 / 8): Pitch battle hand sizes now scale with your office tier (3 in the Garage, 5 in Co-Working, 8 at the Tech Campus), with accurate turn tracking and instant card replenishment. • Leaderboard Outlier Protection: Added multi-layer score validation and save sanitization to keep Game Center and Play Games high scores fair.
MoreSubscriptions & In-App Purchases
$2.99
Dot-Com Disaster DLC
4 dot-com CTOs, 4 moguls, 2 specialists, and 3 events.
Events
Cold markets. Rivals attack. IPO or bust.
Oct 1, 2026 — Oct 15, 2026
FAQ
What is Silly Con Valley?
Silly Con Valley is a satirical tech startup simulation game where players build and manage their own company. It features card-based pitch battles, hiring quirky talent, and navigating the challenges of the tech industry.
Does Silly Con Valley have ads?
Yes, Silly Con Valley contains advertisements. As a free-to-play game with in-app purchases, ads are part of the monetization model.
What kind of gameplay mechanics does Silly Con Valley offer?
The game involves strategic decision-making in hiring, product development, and financial management. Key mechanics include card-based pitch battles against VCs and managing office upgrades and infrastructure.
Can I play Silly Con Valley offline?
The provided data does not specify whether Silly Con Valley supports offline play. It is recommended to check the app store page for details on connectivity requirements.
What are the different CEO archetypes in Silly Con Valley?
Silly Con Valley features 21 satirical CEO archetypes across 5 tiers, including roles like The Visionary, The Hustler, The Engineer, and unlockable legends such as The Growth Hacker and The Chaos Agent. Each archetype has unique abilities and perks.
How does Silly Con Valley handle in-app purchases?
Silly Con Valley offers in-app purchases, which are common in free-to-play games to enhance the player experience. These might include boosts, cosmetic items, or ways to speed up progression.
What is the age rating for Silly Con Valley?
Silly Con Valley has an age rating of 12+. This indicates it is suitable for players aged 12 and older, likely due to its satirical themes and simulated business challenges.
How often is Silly Con Valley updated?
The latest version of Silly Con Valley is 1.40, and it was last updated on August 14, 2026. This suggests a relatively active development cycle, with updates potentially occurring regularly.
