Edit: AVOID AT ALL COSTS IF YOU’RE NOT ORTHODOX
Very few matchmakers actually invest time into matchmaking.
I reported something racists someone said to me, and they told me to find a different app. This is all in email and I’m happy to share my experience and evidence.
I reported something racists someone said to me, and they told me to find a different app. This is all in email and I’m happy to share my experience and evidence.
I had such a bad experience
It was very clear that my matchmaker went with absolutely no criteria other than age. The crazy thing is, I’m known for being the opposite of picky. That’s my whole thing. But the matches they set me up with felt … insulting. And that was a first for me, ever.
Like, come on. This is the exact reason why I never dated within the Jewish community: that practice within the frum community where if a girl reaches the shockingly ancient age of 29 they’ll rush to pair her with an unemployed & mentally ill 58 year old just to see her married because (gasp!) Anything is better than not being married!
In the outside world, the topic of my illness is barely even a speaking point in dating, but here it was as if I were sent to a leper colony.
Like, come on. This is the exact reason why I never dated within the Jewish community: that practice within the frum community where if a girl reaches the shockingly ancient age of 29 they’ll rush to pair her with an unemployed & mentally ill 58 year old just to see her married because (gasp!) Anything is better than not being married!
In the outside world, the topic of my illness is barely even a speaking point in dating, but here it was as if I were sent to a leper colony.
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Entirely dependent on matchmaker and their aptitude
Since you only have a limited number of slots for matches, and matches sent + responses are horribly slow and often misaligned, the app has become, mathematically, a waste of time.
I’m sure this service is great for many orthodox people, and some in other denominations. Alas, many people here have had their accounts set up by other people and don’t have full or authentic bios. As a result, you need to get on the phone and actually talk with them (like anyone) to determine whether there’s a true connection.
The problem is that, to get to that point, the matchmakers need to send you people AND they need to reply to you. These are the two (VERY critical) bottlenecks: most Matchmakers seem to just send anyone who meets your criteria, regardless of what their bio says + the matches (at least for me and friends) take multiple days to reply to even set up time to speak or meet.
I’m sure this service is great for many orthodox people, and some in other denominations. Alas, many people here have had their accounts set up by other people and don’t have full or authentic bios. As a result, you need to get on the phone and actually talk with them (like anyone) to determine whether there’s a true connection.
The problem is that, to get to that point, the matchmakers need to send you people AND they need to reply to you. These are the two (VERY critical) bottlenecks: most Matchmakers seem to just send anyone who meets your criteria, regardless of what their bio says + the matches (at least for me and friends) take multiple days to reply to even set up time to speak or meet.
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1/10 matchmakers really care
If you’re not a conventional orthodox or reform, this service doesn’t increase the probability of meeting “the one”. Many of the matchmakers just read your bio (only some of it) and make a guess about who seems like a fit based on a few words in the other bio.
Sadly, there are a non-trivial amount of matchmakers that actually care about finding the right match, but there’s no incentive for them to encourage others to do the same, and no substantial reward or incentive for others to actually care about reading bios since the probability of a match, and an actual reward, is low no matter what. I wish it was better, and I’d be happy to help them code a better system.
Sadly, there are a non-trivial amount of matchmakers that actually care about finding the right match, but there’s no incentive for them to encourage others to do the same, and no substantial reward or incentive for others to actually care about reading bios since the probability of a match, and an actual reward, is low no matter what. I wish it was better, and I’d be happy to help them code a better system.
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Good app
I’ve only been on it for a few months without a subscription and get regular matches. Many don’t fit my criteria but I’m only looking for 1 solid connection. I’m going to upgrade to a paying membership to see how it goes. I think having good pictures & a well written profile definitely helps.
