I hate you sage
Sage dining obliterated my family, I barely made it out alive. While on a bike ride with my family on a beautiful Sunday afternoon, I suddenly had a immense migraine. My vision became blurry and I told my kids and wife to stop. The world went dark, colors started to appear and I passed out. I awoke in some facility chained to a pole with large conveyor belts and loud machinery around me. After a long time of struggling I was able to free myself from my chains. I stayed low, not knowing who could have been there. Suddenly, I can here my wife scream my name, I call back hoping for a response. I find them locked onto a conveyer belt traveling into a machine. I try to free my wife but she pushed me off, telling me to help the kids but it was no use. I watched my family move into the machine not being able to free them. I run to the other side to try and help from there yet, there was nothing but what looked like some kind of powder, my family had died right in front of me. Full of anger and mourning I sprint to an exit. When i get out, all I see is a field for miles. I turn around toward the warehouse I came out of, I see Touch of Sage across the side. I’m coming for you Sage.
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Why I don’t drink the refreshments
So one day after class it was Time for lunch oh no my least favorite time of the day! I would rather the rats cook for us! So one day I was sitting at lunch with my friend greg and we were so thirsty!!! so we went to look at the drinks their was so unusual spa watersome unlabeled, sports drink, and some orange juice and some unusual yellow sensation with some no discotion and I drank it it was warm. It made my throat feel weird and tingly. and I chugged it until it was gone. Because I was so hungry that day I started to feel a little woozy then out of thin air, I fell on the floor my friend Patty Farrell had to drag me out of the cafeteria! And that day I never woke up! now, so please do not eat sage I am warning you!!!!!
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Response from developer
The ratings here are for the actual Touch of SAGE app. We’re sorry to hear you experienced food that wasn’t up to our high-quality standard. So that your feedback can reach the right person who can improve your dining program, please rate and review menu items within the Touch of SAGE app. You can also leave a comment on the board in your dining hall or speak with your SAGE Manager. Thanks.
Why I don’t drink the refreshments
So one day after class it was Time for lunch oh no my least favorite time of the day! I would rather the rats cook for us! So one day I was sitting at lunch with my friend greg and we were so thirsty!!! so we went to look at the drinks their was so unusual spa watersome unlabeled, sports drink, and some orange juice and some unusual yellow sensation with no discotion and I drank it it was warm. It made my throat feel weird and tingly. and I chugged it until it was gone. Because I was so hungry that day I started to feel a little woozy then out of thin air, I fell on the floor my friend Patty Farrell had to drag me out of the cafeteria! And that day I never woke up! now, so please do not eat sage I am warning you!!!!!
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Attack of the sage rats
The year was 2020, aka the year of the attack of the rats. I was sitting in class one Monday afternoon as my stomach grumbles anticipating for the bell to ring. suddenly I heard this loud ring. Finally the bell rang! Time for lunch! When I get there i see a rat crawling across the stage. I got my lunch and i found a tooth from a rat but, it was to late. suddenly i didn’t feel so well. Then I realized i had got covid. I take a look around the cafeteria and see all my peers on the floor covering there stomachs. That was the worst day of my life and the day I lost all my friends. My name is Patty Williams and i’m a ghost from 2020. I died a couple months later from the unexpected virus the rats gave me. My death was very tragic and unexpected. In a couple years I will come back to the same cafeteria I was in that day, that very same seat and I will take my revenge.
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Attack of the sage rats
The year was 2020, aka the year of the attack of the rats. I was sitting in class one Monday afternoon as my stomach grumbles anticipating for the bell to ring. suddenly I heard this loud ring. Finally the bell rang! Time for lunch! When I get there i see a rat crawling across the stage. I got my lunch and i found a tooth from a rat but, it was to late. suddenly i didn’t feel so well. Then I realized i had got covid. I take a look around the cafeteria and see all my peers on the floor covering there stomachs. That was the worst day of my life and the day I lost all my friends. My name is Patty Williams and i’m a ghost from 2020. I died a couple months later from the unexpected virus the rats gave me. My death was very tragic and unexpected. In a couple years I will come back to the same cafeteria I was in that day, that very same seat and I will take my revenge.
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On behalf of my friend Grady
Orange chicken. It used to be my favorite meal. The rich sweet tangy sauce mixed with savory chicken. It was AMAZING. until I met Sage. I stood in the line awaiting my unknown fate. I sat down and sunk my teeth into the soggy breading and chewy chicken meat. The tangy sauce now with extreme detail tasted of stinky dog feet after trecking through the tough terrain of a dumpster. I suffered through the meal being extremely hungry. Back at my house, I felt a grumbling. A magnitude 10 earthquake. I sat on the toilet and prayed for god's forgiveness. "WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS!!!!," I said. 14 hours 23 minuites on the toilet, STRAIGT. I set up a TV in my bathroom so I could continue my Fortnite gamer career. But I got out of a day of school so it was all worth it. 5 stars. Would recommend.
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Hours On The Toilet
Orange chicken. It used to be my favorite meal. The rich sweet tangy sauce mixed with savory chicken. It was AMAZING. until I met sage. I stood in the line awaiting my unknown fate. I sat down and ssunk my teeth into the soggy breading and chewy chicken meat. The tangy sauce now with extreme detail tasted of stinky dog feet after trecking through the tough terain of a dumpster. I suffered through the meal being extremely hungry. Back at my house i felt a grumbling. A magnitude 10 earthquake. I sat on the toilet and prayed for god's forgiveness. "WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS!!!!," i said. 14 hours 23 minuites on the toilet, STRAIGT. I set up a TV in my bathroom so I could continue my fornite gamer career. But I got out of a day of school so it was all worth it. 5 stars.
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I found Jesus 🙏🛐
I am sitting in calculus, my stomach growled and kicked me and I was starving. As I waited passionately in the line ravenously looking the delicious pasta I grab my plate. I look down at my clean plate to see my reflection, but when I looked down I saw me and another. IT WAS THE LORD!!! I saw his face and he said to me, go and preach the gospel (also your failing Bible) 10/10 find Jesus at Sage dining. ❤️❤️
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Still shaking after this…
It was a normal Wednesday lunch, and I decided I wanted to eat some spaghetti. A lovely dish, and even better with pesto. I waited in line, patiently awaiting the sweet sensation of the carb-loaded food to explode with flavor inside my mouth. I sat down and began eating normally, but then, I saw it. We made eye contact. An angry spaghetti. She stared at my mouth with fiery eyes and squared up. She began straggling me. From the moment she touched my neck, I knew this was a fight to the death. I began gasping for air, hoping for relief, then I was instantly met with a calm after I absolutely devoured that byotch.
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The adventures of me (and sage but their not the main character here)
I was in the water park when suddenly I saw sage dining, this was my first mistake. I went up to them to get noodles and they just stared at me. While scooping my noodles they all suddenly looked away from me. Except one a very tall person, and they said we will destroy you. Shortly after that sage came to my school and acted normal until I came in. they stared at me and refused to give me soup. After that during class I heard the tall persons voice “we will destroy you” everyone was staring at me blankly. sage had done something I RAN now I live in a jungle. SAVE DINING
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